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Back from Denver and the album is OUT!

Back from Denver and the album is OUT! Though I couldn’t fucking find it in my neighborhood today… I have to give a special thanks to Tim and Mark from KDKB in Phoenix, they had me on their radio show this morning and pumped up the album, then Mark called me later in the afternoon to tell me he had received a call from the Warner Bros. rep in Phoenix who told him that they had already sold out of my albums there and had to overnight a new shipment! I owe it all to Tim and Mark, those guys have been beating the drum for me there on their station playing Voodoo Punanny for MONTHS!!

If nobody knows about it, it doesn’t matter how good an album is, and it’s really hard to get someone to find out about a comedy album from a minor league celebrity like me. Thanks to them, at least the peeps in Phoenix know.

I did politically incorrect tonight, it was a pretty fun one. The guests were Shari Bellafonte, Kari Wuhrer, and this guy David McReynolds that’s running for president under the “socialist” party…Doh!!! He seemed like a pretty nice guy before the show, but then on the show he was spouting out some retarded socialist horseshit about people not getting paid enough and how CEO’s make 400 times more than the average person, (like it’s easy to be a CEO or something) and how rich people need to pay far more than the 48% in taxes I fucking pay right now, and I freaked. He also said that people that make 30,000 or less should pay NO taxes at all. I think I said I wanted to kill him or something.

Shari Bellafonte is some hot piece of ass!!! She’s a really nice lady, and she’s 46 years old with the body of a fit 30 year old. She’s in this months playboy, and Kari and I were checking it out right in front of her. She had a big smile on her face the whole time we were looking at photos of her bare juicy ass. And she was smiling for good reason, cause she knows she looks fucking great. Now I know playboy uses all sorts of airbrushing and shit, but she was right in front of me and she looked fantastic there too. I really appreciate a woman that takes care of herself like that, she obviously works hard, and she’s rewarded with an amazing body. It just makes you want to fucking slap lazy fatties that are running around telling you that they think their overweight sloppy asses are sexy. They’ve got that big fat denial filled Emme leading the pack telling you she feels sexy at 200lbs.

emme_pic

Suuuuuuuure you do, chubby. Everyone thinks a dumpy cottage cheesy ass that you can show a fucking drive-in movie on is sexy. Put down the twinkies and get your lazy ass down to the local magazine store! But this months playboy with Shari in it, cut out her picture and put it on your wall.

shari_pic

Bow to it everyday!

Understand that she is about 20 years OLDER than you and has a body that’s about 20 times sexier. You only have one life to live.

Now get your fucking ass to the gym!

I just got an offer to do Carolines Comedy Club in NY, NY in September. Even though the club kinda freaks me out because the audience is REALLY fucking close to the stage, I’m gonna take the gig because I can’t wait to get back to NY. The MAIN reason I wanna go there is I wanna try to get on the Howard Stern show. To have him play my stuff is an honor, but to actually get on the show and have an audience with him would be the shit. I swear to god, more people come up to me everyday telling me they heard my shit on Stern than any other thing I’ve ever done EVER. Plus I need some good fucking Italian food, and the shit they serve here can only hold me over for 6 months at a time.

Lots of action on the sitcom script I wrote with Bill Masters. We have quite a few big time Hollywood type studios interested in it, now we have to figure out who’s gonna give me the most cash and fuck with the story the least. I’ll keep you posted here as soon as I know what’s up…