Back in the Box…

I’m hosting a new show coming out on NBC called "Fear Factor."It’s one of those crazy new reality shows that all the kids are talking about where attention starved freaks do dangerous shit for money, 15 minutes of fame, and your amusement. It’s pretty fucked up, and if you tune in you’re gonna see some really ridiculous shit. I can’t really say too much about the stunts but I can tell you my reaction when they told me about some of the things they were gonna have people do, it was something along the lines of "Are you fucking shitting me?"

The NBC executives told me they were not, and said that they needed someone to host the show that was as fucked up as the stunts are.

I took that as a compliment, and said "I’m in!" We started taping last week, and the show should be on the air sometime after the spring. I’ll let you know the exact air date here as soon as I know it.

Hopefully no retards out there watching will try to duplicate stuff and get themselves mangled.

This isn’t the show that I took my website down for, that’s another one that I’m working on right now called "Rogan’s Law."

It’s a court show for late night TV where I play the judge. It’s a real show with real actual cases, only obviously I’m not a real judge.

These dopes that appear on the show will have to sign off their rights and abide by my rulings, and I get to torture them on TV. The actual law has no bearing on the case whatsoever, it’s all in how I decide to rule based on what I think. That, and whatever is funnier.

You ever watch one of those court shows and you just wanted to fucking scream at the sub-human morons and their retarded case? Well, I’m gonna do that for you.

No need to thank me, it’s my pleasure. Is TV going down hill?

Yup. But you know what, who fucking cares? There’s 500 fucking channels out there now, and if you’re seeking cultural enrichment and enlightenment from corporate advertising supported TV, then you’re a fucking idiot anyway. TV is for one thing and one thing only: ENTERTAINMENT. I don’t know about you, but I find attention freaks doing ridiculous shit for money quite entertaining. If I want education and enrichment I’ll read a book or watch the History channel.

I’m tired of that fucking retarded argument that television is ruining kids. And I’m tired of people looking for excuses and blaming others for why their moron kids do stupid shit. Kids have always been dumb, because dumb people have more kids than smart people.

That’s a fact.

Morons are out breeding smart people 20 to 1, and of the smart people that do have kids, 7 out of 10 of them are too fucking selfish to make good parents, so even the kids that grow up with the mental capacity to evolve their ideas and thoughts are saddled with the burden of a shitty childhood and emotional troubles. The Human race is fucked, and it’s hanging by a string. And you know what? It’s ALWAYS BEEN THIS WAY. How the fuck do you think Hitler got into power in Germany? How about the inquisition? Think there was some clear thinking evolved people in charge there?

And as far as pop-culture goes, it’s always the same lame arguments from the same short sighted people: "Popular music has really gone down hill, I can’t believe how popular the Backsteet boys are" Oh yeah? Did you conveniently forget about The Osmond brothers and New Kids On The Block?

"Well these TV shows on the air now, they’re ruining children…"

Unlike those steaming pieces of shit from the past like "Father knows best" and "Full House." Those shows really painted an accurate portrait of human life in America, and educated as well as entertained.

Shut the fuck up.

People are dumb, and they’ve always been dumb. I really don’t see it getting any better in my lifetime. Not unless the aliens land on the White House lawn on Monday with the wisdom of the heavens and the key to enlightenment. The best we can hope for is pockets of cool people that you can surround yourself with. People that are smart, people that want to enjoy life and have fun. People that get it.

That, and fucked up shit to amuse yourself with.

TV is now officially out of control, and I couldn’t be happier. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, were about 3 seasons away from "The Running Man." If that happens and I get to host it, my life’s work will be complete. Until then, I hope you enjoy "Fear Factor" and "Rogan’s Law," two more steps on the road to a perfect culture.