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Fat black hooker pic that those textamerica babies deleted.

Every so often I post up a pic from my cellphone as a goof, it’s in a little section of the site in the upper left called “Latest phone cam shots.”

I have it set up so that I can take a picture, and then seconds away I can send it to my cell phone cam website at textamerica.com, and it’ll be posted there with a thumbnail link on my site here. So far I haven’t really taken anything too terribly interesting. Just regular shit day to day shit, and people making goofy faces.

Well, the other day I hit cell phone-camera fucking gold.

A precious moment captured and shared with the whole world. (or at least whatever tiny section of the world it is that gives a shit to read this site at all, and the even tinier section that’s still reading at this point)

So anyway, here’s what happened. We were filming in a horrible section of downtown LA, and this really skanky hooker (and I mean that in the best way possible, because she was actually a very nice lady) flashed me her tit.

I asked her to do it again so I can get a picture for my website and she obliged. I took this great picture of it what can only loosely be described as a woman’s tit with my motorola V710, it’s one of those megapixel camera phones, so it takes really big, clear pictures.

I was so happy. Very few things in life make me as happy as when I see humanity gone horribly astray. I’m just fascinated by humans in general, and when I see one that’s completely out to lunch, (literally, look at her sandwich) and I can get her to flash me for a picture that posts immediately on my website?

I couldn’t be happier.

I looked at the pic on my camera like a proud papa. I was so fucking happy that this was going to be on my website.

Well, much to my dismay, when I got home I received a stern warning from textamerica saying I had violated their policies, and that they had deleted the offending picture.

HOW DARE THEY.

Anybody that would be offended by seeing this picture on the internet should be fucking shunned.

A grown man insulted by a tit? I refuse to believe it.

Who is this bothering? The children?

Fucking please. They would react the same way anyone with a brain would react; they would laugh, because it’s fucking funny.

It’s a universal truth: very few things in life are as funny as fat black hookers. Especially when they’re eating a sandwich and flashing you a tit.

I wanna know who is this really going to bother?

Is it going to bother your mom? Doesn’t she have her own tits?

Why does she give a shit if she accidentally sees one on a website on the internet?

Isn’t it 2000 and fucking 5?

I just can’t believe that stuff like this still bothers some people.

Well, for those that it doesn’t bother, I salute you.

I thank you for your ability to see the humor in moments like this.

I want to praise you for seeing the big picture and for not taking your experience in this temporary situation we call life too seriously.

To reward you for your clarity and your vision, I present you with a big fat black hooker eating a sandwich and flashing her tit.

fatblackhookertit

God bless you all.