Rocky Mountain High

I’m checked into my hotel room right now, and it’s 1:07am mountain time.
I’m in Denver, Colorado for the weekend to perform at the Comedy Works South, their 2nd club in the city. I’ve been coming here for years, and I love it so much I’ve been thinking of moving out here. I know it gets cold as fuck in the winter, but it’s only for a couple months, and I’ve always had this thing in the back of my head about wanting to live in the mountains.
I’ve even been out here a couple times just to look at real estate. I haven’t pulled the trigger yet, but at this point in my life there’s not much holding me in LA. Most of the time I’m traveling for work with my stand up and the UFC, so really the only thing keeping me there is my house and my friends.

The traffic in LA has reached crisis levels. It could be 2 in the afternoon or 2 in the morning and you could easily be stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic miles long. It just makes no sense. The highways are fucking huge out there, but there’s so many people that it just doesn’t matter. There’s something insane like 36 million people living in California, and at least 20 million live in the LA area. That’s all just guesswork too, because they really have no idea how many “illegals” there are living there.
The weather is great in LA, but the air quality is borderline toxic. I was visiting Boulder recently looking at houses, and you can literally feel the difference in the air. The sky looks bluer too, because you don’t have to look at it through a brown cloud of stinky exhaust fumes. Sometimes you don’t even realize how bad it is because you just get used to it, but recently we’ve had a lot of rain in LA, and right after the rain rolls in and the clouds part you could see all these mountains in the distance, mountains that on normal days are completely hidden behind the thick, brown, shitty air.
I was looking at it the other day thinking out loud to myself, “that CAN’T be good.”
I’m breathing that shit? That’s gotta be affecting me. I mean if it’s hiding these fucking gigantic mountains, what the hell is it doing to my lungs?
What is it doing to my mind? How much does all that pollution affect your thinking and your physical well-being? I’ve just got to think that it makes a big difference.

I’ve been living in LA for over 14 years now, and you can feel it getting worse every year. What used to take a half hour to get somewhere back then could easily take an hour or more today, and it’s getting worse. People are constantly moving out there, chasing the dream. Some for the weather, some for the lure of a career in showbiz, some to escape Mexico – it’s a never ending surge of human beings looking for something that’s going to improve their lives in the fakest city in the fucking world.
I just wonder how long we can keep stuffing humans into this one, clogged up area, and what it’s going to be like there in the future.

I look at living in LA like playing a gigantic game of musical chairs; you know it’s going to end eventually, but right now the music is playing and everyone is pretending it’s going to last forever. If I’m smart I’ll pull up a chair in Colorado and watch the end on TV from a house in the mountains.

Thursday and Friday morning Ari Shaffir, Tom Segura and I will be on KBPI my favorite local station here in Denver. On Friday I’m actually taking over the show because my buddy Willie B the morning DJ has something that he’s got to do, so from 7am to 10am I’m going to be the guest fill in DJ, and Ari and Tom are going to join me on the air.
You can listen live wherever you are on the internet if you go to their site:

And of course we’re here all weekend performing at the Comedy Works.
This is a special weekend for me, because it’s my last weekend before I go to Columbus to film my spike special. If you’re in Colorado anywhere near by, come on down and join in on the fun.
Thanks for all the support, I really can’t tell you all how much I truly appreciate it.