Thanks, emails and audio

It’s been a crazy week in the wonderful world of comedy crime fighting, but I’ve gotta say what I’m getting out of this is really actually giving me hope.

I would really like to thank all of the people that came out to my new LA comedy home, the Improv to show their support this past weekend. The turnout and the support was incredible. I talked to several people that flew in from all over the country for the shows, and I can’t even begin to describe how moved I am by that. The amount of support that I’ve gotten has been really amazing.

With these kinds of public situations, especially between two entertainers, you’ve just gotta expect that there’s going to be a lot of people that love you or hate you for what you’ve said that’s caused so much commotion, but I’ve got to say, in this case the response has been overwhelmingly positive.

I mean, really overwhelmingly positive. I’ve literally gotten thousands of myspace messages and emails over the last few days, and less than 20 of them have been negative.

I’m not even slightly exaggerating, and the ones that have been negative are so retarded that they’re like little comedy rewards from the universe just to let me know that I’m on the right track.

Check out this fucking gem:

“Unfortunately it is extremely clear there is an extreme amount of jealousy and resentment you have towards Carlos. He carries himself with pride and class and doesn’t walk around looking like he needs a free meal and a razor to clean up. I don’t care if he does steal shit from other people because it is obvious that he must tell the shit better than others. I have seen his show and it is always a sell out and it makes people laugh and go home feeling good. You are only out there to be an ass like always because you feel inferior to Carlos and will never be as popular or successful as he is. I don’t care that you did Fear Factor because you sucked in that also. So why don’t you get a life and take a shower and shave up and head to your local mission and get a free meal you loser!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

The best part was going to her myspace profile and seeing the pictures:

fatlady and stripper1

fat lady and stripper2

Nice pants.

These are the followers of The Carlos.™

I’m telling you, man… the universe has a sense of humor. A fucking wicked one, too.

From the bottom of my soul, I would like to thank each and every one of you that went out of your way to send me a message, and I would also like to thank all the people that sent letters of support over the whole situation.

There’s no way I can answer every single email, and there’s no way I would ever hire someone to answer shit for me and pretend it’s me. At the very least I try to read them all. If you do get an email from me, I swear on my word that you’re getting it straight from me. I’m not cutting and pasting anything. Even if it’s only a quick “thank you very much, I really appreciate it” I’m going to type that shit out, word for word every single time, for each individual person.

In no way do I ever take people’s appreciation of something I do lightly. Criticism, appreciation, it’s all necessary, and I personally welcome it all. Even the negative shit.

We’re all one, even the shitty parts of us. The ugly stuff reminds me of how the damaged human mind works, and it gives me something to laugh at.

What has really been amazing about this whole experience is not just how many people were pissed off, but how many people stepped up and did something about it. Not just read my blog, watched the video and thought, “haha, that dude got busted” (which is probably what I would have done if I read about it and I wasn’t a comic) but actually did something.

They called the comedy store, called the Gersh agency, sent in emails…

That really, really means a lot to me.

This is just one of many, many fantastic emails that people sent in to the store, and although I appreciate every single email equally, I think it’s a great representation of how many cool people spoke their mind about this whole thing:

“To Whom It May Concern:

I’ve been a loyal customer of the Comedy Store for
years, but I’m never coming back.

I’m a federal prosecutor, and I prosecute all sorts of
crimes. What Mencia does is the comedy equivalent of
a crime. He’s no different from the white collar
fraudsters I’ve put away.

Is there really any question Mencia steals material?
It’s certainly more likely than not that he does, and
it seems to have been proved beyond a reasonable doubt
by witnesses and video. I convince 12 people to
convict criminals on this kind of evidence all the

So, Mencia’s committed the crime. And what have you
done? You’ve punished not him, but the guy who
exposed the crime. Tell me how that makes sense.

(And please don’t tell me everybody does it, or that
there are people who do it more — that’s what felons
regularly tell me when we’ve nailed them.)

I understand — it’s about the bottom line. Mencia
brings in more money than Rogan, so Mencia stays and
Rogan goes. When you did the math, what was the
dollar figure you put on your integrity? The way I
see it, in hoping to sell out, you sold yourselves
out. That’s the bottom line.

And here’s my bottom line — you’ll never make another
cent off me again. And something tells me I’m not


The first person I talked to about the situation on air was my friend Jim Breuer on his “Breuer Unleashed” show on Sirius satellite radio. There’s an audio file of it below. I wanted to do Jim’s show because we’re buddies from way back, and because Jim has had some problems with comics stealing from him over the years, and also because since his show is on satellite radio there’s no censorship. I’m gonna call Opie and Anthony this week too, because I love those guys, and it’s my favorite show.

I should have already called in, but I’ve been too much of a lazy twat to get up at 5am.

There’s a lot of shit to listen to on the Breuer show, but part 2 is where we really got into how I feel about the whole situation. We also talked a lot about life, technology, and some other cool shit. I think it’s one of the best interviews I’ve ever done.

Jim’s show is always a fucking blast to do, and it always makes me feel like doing my own radio show.

You can download it here:

Here’s another interesting radio interview that’s getting tossed around the internet, it’s The Carlos™ on the Mikey show in San Diego. He’s defending himself saying that he never steals material, and then he tries to be funny, and goes ahead and steals someone’s material. The DJ, Mikey, who’s a cool motherfucker, says Carlos will never be back on his show again.

The sick get sicker.

Hilarious shit.…Radio_Show

Click on the story on digg for the mp3, and then cut to the end for the payoff.

I think the most promising aspect of this whole event has been the awakening of the stand up comedy community, and the clear signal that has been sent that it’s a different world we’re living in now.

The internet is powering a new age in information where you no longer need television, radio or print media to get a message out.

The individual is no longer helpless on their own. All you need is a computer and an internet connection and you can make a real impact. Millions and millions of people have seen that video now, and I’m sure that joke thieves all over the world are nervous as fuck.

For years we’ve had to rely on clubs and agents to take care of these problems for us, which is a whole lot like asking pimps to take care of the problem of guys cheating on their wives.

Not any more.

Power to the people.

Thanks again for all your support.